A Vomiting Story

Ladies and gentlemen, comes not from a question but from something I observed in a Tokyo Metro station a couple of years ago.

As someone striving to improve your English, you can’t get around the fact that at some point you are going to suck, and you’re gonna make mistakes and screw up your conversations.

Yes, you should always be pushing forward to improve yourself and make every conversation better than the last, but again, you can’t get around the fact that at some point you’re gonna screw up.

Well I say, if you’re gonna screw up do it in an elegant, confident manner.

A couple of years ago when I still lived in Tokyo, I attended a seminar and I was on my way home fairly late in the evening, when in one of the Tokyo Metro stations, I observed a university student sitting on the floor, absolutely shit-faced.

He was so drunk, he was wobbling from side to side. He was quite pale and did not look well.

And indeed, a few moments later, he rather calmly and casually pulled from his pocket a plastic bag, opened it, vomited in it, tied it together, and then placed it neatly down beside him and continued wobbling from side to side.

Not looking in the least embarrassed about what had just happened.

Now, I don’t condone getting so drunk that you can’t stand up and you’re gonna vomit in a train station, but at the same time, if it’s gonna happen, it’s gonna happen.

And rather than making a big deal of it, getting all panicky and making a scene, just deal with it in the most elegant way that you possibly can.

It’s a humorous story to be sure, but one that if you think about it, you actually can learn something quite important about speaking better in English conversation.

If you’re not sure what to do to get this focused intensive learning, or indeed how you should be going about the relaxed exposure part of your learning, or what materials you should be studying to progress quickly in English I put together this free training.


Meet the Author

Julian Northbrook

Julian Northbrook is an unconventional punk of the business English learning world. A leading expert in English education and direct response marketing, he’s fully equipped to drag you kicking and screaming from English-mediocracy to speaking at an outstanding level. After being turned down for his dream job in the art industry, Julian suffered three long years as a crap Japanese speaker. He understands exactly what it’s like to feel like a total idiot every time you speak. But Julian overcame his language problems, mastered the language, and went on to work first as a freelance translator, then as an executive member of a Japanese company. But he soon grew sick of the corporate world and left it to pursue something infinitely more satisfying — running his own business helping small business owners and entrepreneurs get so good at English that they forget that it’s not their first language. He writes the infamous Doing English Daily Newsletter which you can (and should) subscribe to.