Pregnant on Human Soup

Happy Tuesday.

Today’s mainly been spent planning the upcoming Two Step Speaking — LIVE! event (more on that another time) but while I was searching around for something, I came accross this funny little anecdote bout an exchange student in France:

She’d eaten a lot of food, and was feeling pretty full. So she said, ” Je suis plein!” — “I am full”. Only, in French “I am full” is actually an idiom that means “I’m pregnant”.

Cue much laughter.

We’ve all done it though, haven’t we?

I remember telling a group of teachers ” kono ningen su-pu ha oishii!” (this human soup tastes good) when what I actually meant was, “kono su-pu ninjin ha oishii!” (this carrot soup tastes good).

That didn’t get much laughter, it must be said…

Nervous laughter, maybe.

The point is though, whether we learn from these mistakes or not.

In September’s EES Gazette I go in to detail about some very, very powerful ways to learn from your mistakes, increase your repertoire or conversational-language (so you’re not repeating the the same thing again and again in conversation).

She goes to print on October 1st.

You’ll need to be an EES member before then if you want to get it.

As well as the EES Gazette, you also get weekly lessons to study, complete access to the past lesson archive, the Extraordinary English Conversations interview series, unlimited critiques and feedback on your English, access to the community and much more.

Click here to start your membership.


Julian Northbrook
Language Punk.

P.S. After a break of several months because of my damn shoulder…

I’m *** finally *** back into the weight training.

Suffice to say I hurt all over.

Start your membership here.

The Alimighty Slog

In October I’ll do a completely-Japanese seminar.

Not alone, this time.

It’s a collaborative event that I’m doing with my friend Hitomi (who does life-coaching in Tokyo) — though from very early next year I will be doing the Two Step Speaking LIVE! event (more on that soon).

The title is ” Blogger Meets YouTuber”.

And as part of the promotion …

We thought it’d be fun to have my Camera Girl (i.e. Mrs. Northbrook) write an email series. The event itself isn’t about English — it’s about entrepreneurship, and using communication-platforms such as YouTube and blogs to build relationships with people (similar to what I did at Making Waves several months back).

So the email series is my story as an entrepreneur…

… from the perspective of Mrs. Northbrook.

It’s funny, but the way she saw things was quite different to what I remember.

Quite eye-opening, really.

But anyway, I digress. The first few days writing the emails were really easy for her. It was new, exiting and fun. But then after a few days she started to struggle.

Suddenly writing become a chore.

By then we’d started, though. And we’d already announced the email series. So she didn’t really have a choice — she just had to keep going.

After a while, though, something interesting happened.

Writing became easy and fun to do again.

And importantly, the quality of the emails she’s writing now is much, much higher than in the beginning.

The point is…

Anything new always seems easy and exciting simply because it IS new. But real improvement doesn’t come until later… until after you’ve gotten fed up, wanted to quit, but pushed past that initial slog and kept going anyway.

When it comes to English though, most people DON’T push past. They just stop, procrastinate and never go anywhere.

Occasionally people come to me and say…

“I want to join EES for just one month.”

My reply?

Don’t bother.

It’s a waste of time and money.

If you join EES and do the work, you can see an almost instant boost in your English by doing the Onboarding lesson and submitting something to me for critique.

But ultimately…

You want more than a boost. The REAL improvement comes to those who push past the Almighty Slog, through the lessons week after week, and make it a part of their lives.

If (and only if) you’re prepared to do the work…

You can (and should) join Julian Northbrook’s League of Extraordinary English Speakers here.

But don’t join then piss and moan because you forgot to login and do the lessons for a month.

Seriously: I can’t stand half-measures.

So only join if you’re going to do the bloody work.


Julian Northbrook
Language Punk.

P.S. October’s EES Gazette is all about using a certain ‘tool’ to rapidly increase your repertoire of conversation phrases and expressions.

If you ever feel awkward because you keep saying the same thing over and over again…

This will show you EXACTLY what to do.

As always, she goes to print on the 1st of the month.

Click here to start your membership.

Attack of the Death Metal Grandads

Funny thing happened this morning.

Last night I went to bed at the normal time… but for some reason woke up at about 12:30am. And that was it. I couldn’t get back to sleep. So at 2:30am I just gave up and got up.

Then I went out running at 5am.

So there I am, running alone the river, the air cool, the sun just coming up. Then in front of me I saw something cool…

A 70 year-old-man wearing a Metallica “Ride the Lightning” t-shirt. Random, I thought. But cool. But then a few minutes later I saw another one — this time a System of Down t-shirt. Fine. So old men like heavy metal now, I guess.

But then!

I saw a guy who must’ve been close to 90 wearing a Slayer t-shirt!

Now THAT was too much.

I mean…

Satanic death metal isn’t exactly the kind of thing you expect to hear playing over the speakers in the old people’s home, is it.

Unless it’s an old people’s home run by Satanists.

Turns out the shop “GU” (a super-cheap clothes shop in Japan) has started stocking heavy-metal t-shits. Just because, you know… they can.

Gotta wonder…

What would the old geezers do if they knew what they were wearing?


Totally irrelevant, but October’s EES Gazette is all about how to use a certain ‘tool’ for improving your small-talk and chit-chat ability in English.

As always, she goes to print on the 1st.

You can (and should) join Julian Northbrook’s League of Extraordinary English Speakers here.


Julian Northbrook
Language Punk. Can Barely Stay Awake.